try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
