why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Randomize
