i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
