So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
