i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
