I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
