How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Pooping to opera.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
