Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
