I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
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