alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize