I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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