ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
