We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
