Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
