is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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