I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize