I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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