I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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