Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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