I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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