Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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