We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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