We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Randomize
