READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
