Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
