just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
