Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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