so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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