We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
