real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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