ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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