Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
