and next time when you feel me up, do it right
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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