I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
