Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
should my penis look like a turkey
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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