How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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