I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
