im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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