weddingsv make me drug and hornr
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
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