walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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