erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize