Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Randomize
