butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
