Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
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