Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
