Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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