..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
