Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
