I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
