But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
